I am not perfect. And I am OK with that. But there are days when admitting that to the world can be difficult. It’s in my genes to try to be perfect, to be a leader and an example. I’m so thankful that God intervened in my life three years ago when my mask came off. I realized that being a true example is truly being myself. Flaws and all.
This is why I don’t feel (as) shocked or dissapointed anymore when I hear about pastors falling into sin, men cheating on their wives or women having secret eating disorders. It’s part of our human condition: that this side of Heaven, we are all broken people trying to live a whole life, as best we can.
I’m glad I had those three years to practice being myself in front of the world. It prepared me for the day I felt the dream for Wife.Mom.Superwoman drop into my heart. I wasn’t looking to start a blog. To tell you the truth, a month earlier I had just confided in my best friend, Erin, that I wondered how God could use me when I felt so lonely and rusty. She said the most profound thing to me. “Serve others right where you’re at. God can use us even when we feel we have nothing to give.”
That moment changed my life. That moment prepared me for the birth of Wife.Mom.Superwoman.
I received a powerful comment on my post, 10 Things I Suck At, from a woman named Rose. I have never met Rose, and I’m not sure I ever will. Rose knows me, in part, because she reads my blog. Here is the comment she left:
I sat there, reading that comment… and it was as if the world stood still for a moment. Her words washed over me as a sweet reminder that God can use the broken, wounded, downtrodden and hopeless. We are worthy of a life poured out to others. No matter what the condition of our heart (and life) is.
I didn’t start WMS to win a popularity contest. It was a calling. One that I had to answer. My bones ached for it, while my heart feared it. I took almost 6 months to prepare for the launch, paying someone to design my site to match the exact vision I had for it, taking fun photos with my friend Sarah, praying through the words I would use across my site and hand-picking my Team. I was nobody. I had no “following” and I had no idea if anyone would even read my blog. But I knew I was supposed to do it and I knew someone would be touched by it. Even if it was one.single.soul.
I started this little dream because I knew I had something to give. A flawed, humble, imperfect, but loving voice to speak to the world. Most days, I am able to stay the course and ignore checking my Google Analytics to see how many of you read my blog. Others, I am biting my nails, terrified that you actually did read my blog! Ha. But to tell you the truth, I just want to know that one person is touched by my words.
Sweet, Rose… thank you for reading my blog, and more importantly for accepting my words and stories into your heart. Your comment was more on-time than you could possibly know. I’m glad you don’t think I’m perfect. And I’m mostly glad you and I are both OK with that.
If I could leave a “comment” on the blog of your hearts today, I would say this to you:
You have something someone does not. You are at least one step ahead of that person that’s just waiting for your hello, your hug, your listening ear or your servitude. Don’t withold yourself. You are a gift. Yours is a life that’s meant to be poured out.
Go dump some love on someone today. You’re fully qualified in my book.
Photo credit: Wife.Mom.Superwoman