The Little Foxes are scheming little things. And no, I’m not actually talking about those cute little red pups you see on National Geographic. I’m referring to those relationships and experiences that seek to destroy the vines of our marriages.
There are so many factors that we can’t control in life. My hope today is that we will be reminded to (try to) control that which is within reach for us as wives.
Here are a few of The Little Foxes that I keep an eye on. I certainly don’t want them to destroy my “vineyard of love.” Do you?
Romance Novels. I know, I know. You love Fabio and you just HAVE to know how the “story” ends. You love how he tucks his lovers hair behind her ear, how he whispers sweet nothings to her all night long, and how he treats her like a queen. Sounds perfect. Except for that awful long hair and the fact that he’s NOT your husband! I’m just asking that you keep your library in check. You know how I always say, “Don’t rewrite your love story”? Reading someone else’s is the numero uno way to do just that.
Quick Tip: If you’re going to read a romance novel, make sure it’s not during a low point in your marriage. Reading about someone whose “got it good” while you’re eating a gallon of ice cream in bed and crying because your marriage is falling apart is NOT going to give you hope. It’s just going to make you fat and miserable.
Our Words. Remember my article about the words I’ll never say? Well, in addition to those three words, I also try my hardest never to talk about the other men I find attractive in life. We’ve all done it. You know, when you’re gabbing with your girlfriends about how sexy this actor is or how you’d jump this musician’s bones if you had the chance. DON’T. DO. IT. I can tell you that since I live in L.A. and happen to see these same actors frequently, they are REAL people. We like to pretend it’s “safe” to say these things because these people are so far removed from our lives. The truth is, it probably bothers your man. I mean, I do NOT want to know if my husband thinks Beyonce is sexy. I don’t need that image in my head when I look in the mirror and feel insecure. He chose ME and I don’t need to compare myself to someone else. Let’s give our guys a shot at feeling secure too!
Quick Tip: Guys remember everything. Even if you don’t think he cares, he’ll always remember that time you said Denzel Washington is “fine”. Better to keep your feelings to yourself AND not let them grow, I might add. You never know when you’re going to be stuck in an elevator with your “dream guy” during a low point in your love life. It could happen! I’m just sayin’.
Unforgiveness. This is the sneakiest fox of all. When we tell him “I’m fine” and you know in your heart of hearts you’re not but you go on “living” anyway, you’re setting both of you up for an atomic bomb. As I’ve said before, unforgiveness will keep you from your destiny. It will hold you back from the joyful, fruitful and passionate relationship you signed up for in the first place.
Quick Tip: Next time you try to stuff something down, don’t. Just talk to your man and tell him how you feel. Don’t go crazy and rip him a new one, but be honest. Your secret resentments will come back to haunt you if kept in the dark.
I hope you’ll tuck these little reminders away in your heart today. It’s good to keep tabs on the influences around us. The Little Foxes are up day and night just waiting to pounce. Make sure you stay on guard. Now, put away that sappy love story, shut up, and go forgive your man.
Photo courtesy of Pim Leijen via fotolia