In case you didn’t know, one third of this blog is devoted to my “Wife” posts. That means 33% of the content on my blog is here to educate, equip and empower women to celebrate the gift of wifehood in all its glory! This also means that clearly, we have to talk about sex.
Let’s make a few things clear before we get started.
- Most men don’t need foreplay, but don’t mind it for a short amount of time.
- Most women LOVE foreplay, need it, and prefer to enjoy it for a loooooong period of time.
- Foreplay is probably the most creative part of sex. Why not enjoy it and become an expert?
In the near future I will be posting some fun posts reviewing awesome sex books and hosting guest posts from some fab sexperts to help us rev up our orgasmic experience! Today, however, I thought it would be fun to explore how to please our husbands. I realize the process probably seems obvious: lay on your back and let him go to work. Sure, that’s the easy way to give him what he wants. As wives, we want to have the desire to please him as much as we hope he wants to please us! Here are five quick foreplay tips to please your husband… Enjoy!
1. DISCOVER HIS EROGENOUS ZONES: Foreplay is pointless if you don’t know the areas of his body that are sensitive to stimulation. Believe it or not, his penis and scrotum are not the only hot spots on his bod. There are various areas all over his body (from head to toe) that when stimulated, can produce gentle, mild or intense arousal. I love one exercise that Dr. Laura Berman, LCSW, PhD, shared on Oprah a few years ago. She offered one couple a visual exercise where she provided each with a “Foreplay Map”, which consisted of the outline of the front and backside of the human body. She asked each to number the body parts in the order they’d like to be touched and/or kissed during foreplay. How cool is that? Try it with your hubby tonight and be amazed at all the places he wants to be touched.
Quick Tip: Print off the Foreplay Map and slip it in his briefcase tomorrow morning with a love note leaving him instructions. How sexy would that be to open up mid-meeting? Ha!
2. LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION! You don’t have to have all the fun in the bedroom, you know. It can start with a neck and shoulder massage while he’s playing Xbox. Sit behind him and massage him gently while he’s in his element. After a while slowly kiss his neck and let your hands wander. You get the point. Guys find it really sexy when you initiate outside the bedroom. It’s racy and can be really erotic depending where you start the party. Get creative!
Quick Tip: Men LOVE it when women initiate. Whether you’re poolside soaking up the sun, getting in a quick jog together in your neighborhood or in your car stopped at a light — do something! Give him a passionate kiss or rub up against him in a subtle yet intentional way. Again, you don’t have to be under the sheets to turn him on!
3. LOOK GOOD DOING IT. A lot of men might argue this tip should be numero uno. NEWSFLASH!!! MEN ARE VISUAL! The good news is you don’t have to be a Victoria’s Secret model to set him off. Remember, he married you for you. Take a moment to accentuate the parts of your body that both of you love the most. If it’s your hair, spend that extra 10 minutes beforehand to sex it up. If it’s your breasts, throw on a sexy shelf bra and get ready to WOW him.
Quick Tip: If you aren’t 100% comfortable with your body, it’s totally OK to turn the lights off and light some candles. No one says you have to put yourself all out there if you’re not comfortable! Baby steps are OK.
4. TOUCHING. Real foreplay starts in the opposite direction of his penis. Follow the “map” I mentioned in #1, and once you’re ready to head down south, make sure you pick up the pace. Men like to be touched deliberately. While a gentle stroke sends chills down our spine, most men prefer us to be more agressive with their man parts during foreplay. To be frank, they want to be squeezed, and squeezed hard in all the right places. Feel weird about it? Just ask him!
Quick Tip: Ask him to give you verbal feedback while you’re making out. Let him lead you where he wants your mouth and hands. It can be really erotic for both of you!
5. GIVE HIM A GOOD OL’ HAND JOB. Since I am quite positive some family member somewhere will read this, I’m going to save myself from the embarrassment of explaining this tip and I’m going to refer you to this awesome article from my Twitter friend @HotHolyHumorous. Even if you’ve done this a million times before, this post is super informative and has some great tips.
Quick tip: If you’re out of lubricant use your own saliva. Couples have been using this for centuries!
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